Welcome to THE MONSTER BOTHERER!

We are thrilled to welcome back our new reviewer Emma Penman, who exclusively reviews monster romance, and has returned for another week of Monster Bothering. We decided that as all her reviews have a specific aim, we’ll house them all in one handy feature-cage!

Whilst not necessarily bothering many monsters herself, Emma will be letting us know which monster romance books are worth bothering with…

Content warning: These books are explicit. 

Fangs for Nothing (The Nevermore Murder Club and Smutty Book Coven) – Steffanie Holmes

The series name grabbed my attention for this book before anything else did. “Nevermore Murder Club and Smutty Book Coven.” I didn’t need to know anything else about this book before getting it and instantly started reading. A brief glance at the actual title informed me of the vampire element but I didn’t care. Monstrous romance, murders and book clubs. Winners all.

I’ll try and keep this as spoiler free as possible as with every good murder mystery, there are quite a few twists and turns. Winnie, our female main character and a decluttering expert is called to a job in a small village to tidy up a rather messy castle. Alaric, our vexing vampire, is a hoarder. Centuries of living will do that to a guy, but after isolating himself from humans and vampires alike, he has taken to filling his time with numerous hobbies, and he needs it all cleared and sorted as his mother has presumptuously organised a ball in his home.

Full disclosure, I am obsessed with hoarding tv shows, even cleaning shows. They’re just so satisfying and as I have messy tendencies anyway, they spur me on to tackle long forgotten jobs. A romance centred around clearing out some old junk and bringing life back into a dusty room is great for me, already sparks joy as one Marie Kondo would say.

For the majority of the story, Winnie doesn’t know that her eccentric host with historical clutter and a crumbling old spooky castle, who doesn’t eat and sleeps through the day is a vampire. Winnie, darling, come on! Not to mention her new friends at the book club keep telling her what he is, but what would a bunch of psychics, witches and a lawyer for vampires know?

It’s a slow burn, sweet romance surrounded by chaos, a third act breakup, fake marriage, misunderstandings, feelings of low self-worth and trauma but sprinkled with comedy and some incredibly heart-warming moments (Reginald and his hot chocolate). The spice is moderate but meaningful. This isn’t your typical panty soaking, massive member kind of tale, though there is enough to qualify it for a monster fucker book review. It feels right, not out of place and not just thrown in as filler. While eventually we get our happy ever after, it’s not straightforward and rushed. This couple have to communicate and work together to get what they want.

The murder mystery isn’t the main focus, while part of the story, it’s faded a bit to let our main characters take the stage. Having read other books by this author which feature a bit of crime solving, there’s definitely less to sink your teeth into, but still fun nonetheless.

Representation is heavy in this book. Winnie is dealing with ptsd from having to deal with her hoarding mother and Alaric is a borderline hoarder with depression and low self esteem, he doesn’t believe he deserves happiness because of what he is and what he has done in the past. Moving on is the overall theme of the character’s inner struggles. A fresh start and looking forward

What really makes this book worthwhile though is the characters. They pull you right in and make you a part of their world. I simultaneously want to be Winnie, and every member of the Smutty Book Coven. While they don’t mention reading monster romance, there are a few name drops of dark romance which I’m totally here for, I’m sure they will feature tentacles and tails sooner or later. Coming to this author at this point (this book is one of her most recent) I felt I was missing a lot of context, turns out I was. There is a whole backlog of books set in the village, and surrounding areas to get stuck into, but as a stand alone it was fine. I definitely would recommend at least checking out the Nevermore Bookshop Mysteries series at least. Trust me, it’s worth it. Actually, check out her “Grimdale Graveyard Mysteries” one too. Not monsters (unless we are counting ghosts) but so much fun.

I would bother with Fangs for Nothing. I had a long argument with my other half as to whether vampires really counted in the realms of monster romance, and ultimately feel they deserve a spot. Sure they’re mostly human anatomy wise,  but all the little special features give them that edge above your bog standard normal not – monstrous dude. Holmes’ cosy small town mystery romances deserve attention, and is absolutely binge worthy. You have been warned.